Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘Self Development’

Have you ever considered what motivates you to take action in your life?

A friend of mine uses fear.  She takes action from a place of fear.  Fear of what will happen if she does not force herself to do something she thinks she should be doing.

Unwilling to force myself into action from a place of fear I examined my behavior which results in no action at all.  I talk a lot about what I will do but never seem to take the leap into total action.

I discovered I was talking about it and not doing it partly because I had not really made a commitment to love and support myself.  On some level I was still questioning whether it was right, would I do it right, what would happen if…you get the picture.

I was judging myself and my motives and they did not match up to who I really am.

Then I began to ask myself what it would be like if I made the choice to take action from a place of love.

What if I took the action I wanted to take because I knew without question it was the most loving thing I could do for myself.

What if by making that commitment and following through with a consistent shift in behavior I would be proving I loved myself enough to give myself what I truly wanted.

So, I decided  to take action in the direction of what I wanted without being afraid of what might happen.

I decided to stop judging myself.  I began to praise myself for each tiny step I was making in the direction of my dreams.

I decided to begin to show myself how much I value my relationship with myself.

I decided to provide myself with the love, respect and support I always looked for outside myself but discovered lived inside me all the time.

Now I am focusing on the love within instead of trying to find it somewhere outside myself.

 

 

 

 

Read Full Post »

I had to laugh at myself today.  I actually wanted to return to the peaceful solitude of winter!

This past winter I made great progress staying in the present moment.  Those delicious times of peace and joy felt so wonderful.

Unable to locate work outside my home I focused all my energy on creating art and letting go of all those things inside me that kept me from living a life of peace, love and joy.  I dug deep, learned some new ways of letting go and even shared them with my friends and those who read these posts.

I thought I was ready to face anything and still remain in a state of peace, love and joy.  As usual, my expectations were a little too high.

Now that Spring is here I find myself juggling more part-time jobs than ever in addition to building two businesses.  The madness in my head is keeping me from sleeping and slowing down my ability to deal with the tasks at hand.

They say we teach what we most want to learn.  I feel like I just entered graduate school and forgot everything I ever learned.

So, today I am returning to the basics I have been teaching and applying them to my new situation.

Pay attention to the emotions first.  When I feel uncomfortable instead of allowing my mind to keep thinking thoughts that are causing these unwanted feelings I give it a new job to do.  I ask it to help me identify what I am feeling.

Once I know what I am feeling I sit with it and allow myself plenty of time to feel it intensely.  Emotions are energy passing through and I know if I do not let them out they will make me miserable, my body sick and prevent me from finding that place of love, peace and joy.

When the intensity is gone, which only takes a few moments, I imagine myself offering love and compassion to a child or a pet that is hurt or crying.  I hold those thoughts until I begin to feel the love flowing in and through my body.  That allows me to experience the love my emotions were blocking.

Then I offer prayers of thanksgiving for this experience.  I know its purpose was to help me see a part of myself that needed to be healed in order for me to live the loving, peaceful joyful life I desire.

Next I focus my thoughts on gratitude for everything I can think of in my life now.  I am grateful for the chair I sit in, the desk that holds my computer, the computer, the internet that connects me to you.

Ah, now I am feeling better.

It looks like I have a lot to learn this season.  At least with my new tools I can make it an adventure to discover what else needs to go so I can free myself of past behaviors that no longer serve me.

I will keep you posted on my progress.  Who knows, I might learn something that will help you as well.

Read Full Post »

There is a great classic comedy skit where the therapist tells the client he can solve any issue in five minutes.  When the client begins to describe the problem and all the fear that surrounds it the therapist stops the client.

He then proceeds to tell the client to listen carefully to his advice.  If the advice is followed the client will be cured for life.  The advice is simply two words.  “Stop It!”

Although we may find this funny there is truth in the advice.  If we know something we are doing hurts then in order to feel better we must  stop doing it.

It is easy to see this in physical actions like putting your hand on something hot.  If you touch something that is hot and you get burned you tend to stop intentionally putting your hand on something hot.

What about the times we allow our mind to keep telling us the same story over and over that results in emotional pain?  Rather than stop the mind from running wild we continue to feel bad as it tells us the same story a thousand times.  And, with each telling we feel worse and worse.

We even begin telling others the story.  Maybe we think if someone agrees with us it won’t feel so bad.  At least we will have proof from someone else that we are somehow justified to believe this story that makes us feel so bad.

Then we get to listen to that person’s story that our story reminded them of and we can share in our mutual misery.  If others are in earshot they can join the party and soon we are all feeling hurt, pain and sadness.

We have within us the power to stop it.  We can stop allowing our mind to tell the same stories over and over.  And, we can stop telling that same story to others.

If you are just beginning to learn how to stop your mind it might help to simply give your mind a new job. Give it something else to look for and focus on.

I use gratitude to help change the focus of my mind.  Focusing on something in this present moment for which I am grateful gives my mind the task of looking for something I feel good about.  After continuing to give my mind this same job each time it tries to take me back to the old story I eventually begin to feel peaceful.  In time I find myself able to experience love and joy.

What is your favorite method of changing your thoughts?

Read Full Post »

This week I worked with two different people who experienced difficult love relationship issues.  While the equally painful circumstances were unique to each person the responses were quite different.

One person chose to focus on the hurt while the other chose to bless the situation with love and forgiveness.

The angry person relived the experience over and over.  Thoughts of who did what to who kept feeding the anger and turned to deep inner hurt, pain and despair.

Having traveled the path of the angry person more than once in her life the other person knew it would lead her right back into illness and depression.  She was not willing to allow the experience to rob her of her new-found life filled with love, peace and joy.

Determined to find her way back to joy she chose to forgive herself and the other person.  She offered prayers of blessing for the other person.  And, she congratulated herself for seeing the truth and making the choice to love herself no matter what was happening in her life.

As I reflected on the atmosphere of both discussions I was reminded of how simple it is to change our life in a single moment.

We can choose to look at what we label as “bad” and dredge up memories of the past that support our view.  The painful emotions follow and we find ourselves in a state of self-imposed punishment.

Or, we can choose to examine this mess we find ourselves in and look for the “good”.  Focus on the parts of the mess that are better than the last time we created one and love and bless ourselves for having grown.  Then, focus all our thoughts and attention on being grateful for anything and everything we can think of that we love about our life now.

A simple shift in focus can bring us out of the past and future into the love, joy and peace of the present moment.

Is your focus on loving yourself or hurting yourself?  You have the power to choose right now.  What are you choosing?

Read Full Post »

For some time now I have practiced ways to keep myself focused in the present moment.  Yesterday I noticed something different and want to share it with you.

I was taking a few deep breaths trying to relax the tightness in my shoulders.   As I felt the shoulders relax I noticed  another part of my body was also tight.

When I finally felt my entire body relax…a thought drifted in and captured my attention.   Immediately my shoulders resumed the same raised and tightened place they were in when I started.

After some time of working and observing it became clear the tightness was the result of fear.  I was afraid of what might happen in the future and that fear was keeping my body in a state of stress and dis-ease.

I turned my thoughts to the things I love and appreciate about myself.  I noticed and gave thanks for the things I am grateful are in my life this very moment.

As quickly as my body had become tense it became relaxed.  I was experiencing joy and peace in the place of fear and worry.

It is no wonder we have so many physical problems.  We rarely experience our natural state of simply being.

Living fully focused in the present moment is where we find our health, peace, joy and abundance.

I plan to check in with my body more often to see how I am doing at keeping my thoughts focused in the present moment.

Are your shoulders tight?

Are your hands clenched?

Are you tapping  your feet?

What is your body doing to get  your attention?

A simple change in focus can change your life right this very moment.

Read Full Post »

Let Go

The past few days I have not felt quite right.  Aware my energy level was low I began trying to figure out what to do to change things. The more I tried to figure things out the more out of control my thoughts became.

The usual tasks demanded my attention as well as some I had put off addressing for several months.  Unable to muster the energy to tackle them I finally reached the breaking point this morning in my quiet time.

Unable to figure it all out or know what to do about what felt like a mess I had created I just let go.  I prayed a prayer of total surrender and opened the flood gate of pent-up emotions.

There was an amazing release as I let go my own desires and expectations of myself and what I thought my life should look like.  I let go and let my inner spirit work it out for me.

I remembered the point along my journey when my retina detached.  Prior to that event I had worked out the perfect plan to face my fear of surgery, have the cataracts removed and get on with my life.  When I returned to work my retina detached and my sight changed drastically in a matter of moments.

Intuitively I knew it was bad.  I had no idea what was ahead.  I had come up against a situation beyond my ability to handle.  This was too big for me.  I had to surrender control of my life.

I asked my husband to take me to the river.  Once there I sat down on a rock and closed my eyes.  I could hear the rushing sound of the water as the river flowed past me.

In my mind’s eye I saw myself wrapped in a blanket much like a newborn.  Arms tucked inside I looked like a helpless baby.  I was laying inside the boat floating down the river.

At that moment I prayed a similar prayer of surrender.  I asked God to take care of me and take me wherever I needed to go.  I let go of my will and became one with the perfect will.

I am still in that boat, but occasionally I find myself trying to guide it.  That is when I feel resistance and all sorts of feelings that gently tell me to “let go“.

When I let go and all that stuff I have hung on to rushes out, my spirit fills me back up with healing love.  My energy returns.  I see things more clearly.  I begin to see that where I am and what I am doing now is perfect.  Because, I am in the center of the divine plan for my life.

What do you need to let go of today?

It is so much easier to allow the river of life to lead  you.  Then  you get to enjoy the scenery and not struggle with how to guide the boat.

Read Full Post »

“If Jesus were here would you ask him to heal you?” my husband asked after spending three hours trying to help me sort through the thoughts that were causing me such agony.  I wanted desperately to experience faith healing again without the need for eye surgery. The emotional turmoil caused by the inner battle was devastating.  But, that one question stopped the madness and opened the way for me to see the truth.

Not only could I not ask for healing, I could not even look Jesus in the face.  I carried so much guilt over things I thought I had done wrong.  Things, in my mind that could never be forgiven.  I believed I was an awful person who deserved punishment.

That is when I began in sincere earnest to learn how to love and forgive myself.

What do you believe about yourself?

You are perfect love.

If you think thoughts about yourself that do not support that truth and choose to believe them it is time to give them up.

You are the divine expression of pure Love in the world.

Do not accept any thought that would lead you to believe that is not true.

You have the power to choose which thoughts to believe. Begin today to focus on the good thoughts about yourself.

Affirm those good thoughts over and over. One day you will begin to believe them instead of the lies you have told yourself for so long.

That is what has happened for me.  I spent many years telling myself I was not good enough.  I heard those thoughts so often I came to accept them as my truth.

Once I understood what I was doing I made myself a promise that I would do whatever it took to change.  I began to tell myself the truth.  I denied the old lies and affirmed the truth.

Over time my mind began to accept and believe the truth that I am the divine and perfect expression of Love.

You are that same perfect expression of divine Love.  Embrace it and believe it.  It’s true.

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »